My “Ohio Skills”

I woke up this morning in my little corner of the DFW Metromess to a weather mess, courtesy of a dip in the jet stream. It gave me an opportunity to employ what my sister living in Columbus Ohio called “My Ohio Skills.”

The freezing rain followed by colder temperatures, followed by sleet, followed by snow, is seldom seen in Dallas. When it is seen, well, crappy weather comes with a vengeance. Last winter, just after my birthday, we almost had a complete breakdown of the electrical grid when the snow came with temperatures in the negative degrees.

Because of my “Ohio Skills,” we managed quite well, despite going nearly three days without electricity. I was able to prepare hot meals on the Weber grill and temperatures in the house didn’t fall below 50. No burst pipes (to the chagrin of plumbers who would have loved to fix them for me). The only casualties were a gallon and a half of Blue Bell Ice Cream which happened to melt in the freezer. Alas, alack!

Previous winters found me using those precious “Ohio Skills” taking the other half to work (but not today) or hunting down stray gallons of milk and/or loaves of bread left behind from shoppers stripping the shelves for essentials in anticipation of the storm. This time I didn’t have to fight the crowds, as I beat them to the punch by purchasing what I needed the day before yesterday.

Yesterday was spent making chili and battening down the hatches. And wouldn’t you know, the only preparation I didn’t make was purchasing a box or two of Jiffy brand Corn Bread mix. I was taken to task for my omission by a fellow traveler from California. California? Well, the score will be evened at lunch today as the other half will be preparing some home-made biscuits to have with the chili at lunch. Will follow up with a dish of ice cream.

In the meantime, I have my “Ohio Skills,” honed in winters much colder and much snowier than what we are witnessing this morning. I remember the morning I woke up at three in the morning to the sound of my neighbor’s car horn going off. Ice crystals completed the circuit in the horn button, making the horn sound. I got out of bed, bundled up, went outside, jiggled the neighbor’s horn button, and stopped the noise. A police cruiser came by just as I closed the car door. I was thanked for doing what I did (someone else called the police to come and check on things). The policeman then asked if I knew how cold it was. Before I could tell him that I didn’t want to know, he told me that it was Twenty-Two degrees. Dramatic pause. BELOW ZERO!

So saying, this morning’s temps in the teens in my little corner of the DFW Metromess is the figurative cakewalk in comparison.

It doesn’t make things any less cold and miserable, mind you. I believe that it reinforces the notion that living in the south thins one’s blood over the years, making even a little bit of cold even worse than it really is. I’ve lived here for nearly twenty-four years and have reason to believe that the notion of thinning blood is true.

But I still have my “Ohio Skills.” Along with blankets, hot cocoa and the luxury of not having to be somewhere this morning, I believe I can make this a good day.

Be Seeing You!

(By the way, aside from being red, both vehicles in my driveway were made in Ohio. They have “Ohio Skills,” too!)